2nd Floor (Downtown Huntington Beach)

food: 3/5

experience: 2/5

overall: 2.5/5

Agh. This dumb website changed its formatting again. Oh well. 2nd Floor. It's like a tattoo parlor in the form of a restaurant, and it is located - you got it - upstairs, on the corner of downtown Huntington Beach.

They specialize in bar food, so... American, basically. But their menu is pretty damn huge. Starting with the best of the appetizers...

Quesadilla: 3/5

Pretty big for seven bucks. It's like seven slices, which is weird because I don't know how you cut in seven. But I digest. You can get chicken or steak in it for a few bucks more and I suggest doing that because otherwise its pretty plain. It's crispy but very one-note. Seems like they only use one kind of cheese (probably jack). The guacamole, as expected, is from a package and tastes like it.

Mac & cheese: 5/5

The mac and cheese however. Hoo boy. It's a five cheese mac and cheese so you know it'll either be really good or really underwhelming. A lot of times when these places put a bunch of cheeses in there they don't work together and all end up as one boring, basic, bland mixture. Not so here. Ultra cheesy. Got the crispy bread crumbs on top with a crust, and bacon scattered throughout. Definitely some of the best mac I've had in my life and that says a lot for an appetizer at some bar.

Fried hard-boiled eggs: 3/5

Eggs battered in panko bread crumbs and fried, with the deviled interior spiced with chipotle. It's different for sure. Not sure I like it. Some bacon and chives on top, and raspberry chipotle sauce on the side. The sauce doesn't really go with it. It's all a very weird combo. It's not spicy to me, it just tastes like raspberry dressing.

Jalapeño poppers: 4.5/5

More fried food. Stuffed jalapeños. These have the same batter as fried chicken so it's super crispy. Inside are cream cheese, jalapeño slices, shrimp, bacon, plus raspberry chipotle sauce (above) and sesame seeds on top. It's quite a flavorful combo with a lot of things working together.

Calamari: 1/5

What a disappointment. I'm a huge calamari fan and this is by far the worst I've ever had. So clearly frozen and aged past its prime, this was chewier than a sock. I don't care if that analogy doesn't make sense. The batter was alright but there is no way in hell this can be saved by batter alone. Major pass.

Buffalo wings: 3/5

Again, clearly frozen, or "pre-fab" as my friend calls it. The chicken is over-cooked and dry. The batter is nice and crispy. That part is tasty. But when you cook chicken, freeze it, thaw it out and cook it again it doesn't turn out so well. The fries taste good though. Nice and crispy. Overall though everything on this plate tastes like it's from KFC. KFC is fine, but it's a lot cheaper. Just saying.

Ceviche n' chips: 3/5

Very fishy. Yes, it's made of fish, as it is ceviche, but the fishiness of this makes me think it too is a little past its prime. It still tastes alright, and it's chilled so it at least seems fresh. Pretty vinegar-y too. Long story short, don't come to a tattoo bar looking for fresh seafood. The chips don't even look edible so don't ask me about those. I just ate the ceviche with my fork.

Bavarian baked pretzel: 5/5

The last app I tried. Delicious. A hot, huge baked pretzel with a very bready, doughy interior that tastes like, well, a giant pretzel loaf. Complete with chunks of rock salt on top. The interior obviously is the best part. Comes with a jalapeño nacho cheese and honey mustard horseradish sauce on the side. The mustard is pretty good. You can also get this with a "cheese platter", which is just grapes, cheddar, and pepper jack. So...grocery store items, basically. Pass on the extra six bucks for that.

They have a few salads, five to be exact, but they mostly sounded unappealing except a couple. And the "chef" refused to substitute the pecans in the mixed berry salad so I was left with the last remaining option which was the one with ahi tuna.

Big Island Mike salad: 3/5

Pretty mediocre. It doesn't taste fresh at all and it's not even served chilled - it's like on the lukewarm side. I guess it's to be expected from a bar but still. Food should taste good if you're sober too. My goodness. The seared ahi is lackluster, the wontons and everything just thrown on top and the presentation is pretty pathetic. The mango is good I guess, though there's not much of it. And no, the dressing did not save it. In fact it just tasted like oil.

So, 2nd Floor definitely shines more as a bar than a restaurant. When they were actually open for business they had a dance floor and I'm sure the place was hopping. Now, they have to represent themselves through food alone. With such a huge menu they really fail to shine at any one particular item. There's a good one here and there but they just don't make up for the overall mediocrity. And after the last time with the attitude of the head cook, that just kind of put the final nail in the coffin of me frequenting here. I was gonna try the pizzas next but I can't imagine they'll save this place for me. I gave it a fair shot. But as they say on Shark Tank, for those reasons, I'm out.