California Grubbin'

food: 1.5/5 experience: 0/5 overall: 0/5 Three strikes and you're out. I visited Vung Tau a few times during my semester in San Jose. I gave it a fair shot. I did. But this restaurant isn't for me. The first time I came, I got take-out. Just a basic seafood with vegetables dish. Canh cai thap cam. Sixteen bucks. Some shit right there. You'd think it'd be the soup to end all soups. It was not. It was even less than my lowest expectation. With only three shrimps, three pieces of calamari, and four "fish cakes" swimming in clear broth, this was potentially the most pathetic soup I'd ever seen. The rest was vegetables, primarily cheap unsatisfying ones like cabbage and bok choy. If that weren't bad enough, it wasn't even warm. The broth was hot, but they put all the solid ingredients into another container and those were cold. This box of vegetables and six pieces of shellfish apparently took some genius twenty whole minutes to assemble

food: 3/5 experience: 3/5 overall: 3/5 While South labels itself as, yes, a Southern restaurant, it doesn't quite live up to its name. With promises of the best Southern cooking you'd find in Sacramento, I was pretty excited to sample South's selection. I'd heard it could get pretty crowded. Places are usually popular for a reason, right? Well... this is more like Sacramento's hipster take on Southern cuisine. First, not to discriminate, but it's run mostly by people who fit the typical description of hipster, complete with mustache and open-button short-sleeve shirt showing off the tats. The interior is sparse. It's seat-yourself, get-water-yourself (in tiny glasses), get-your-own-silverware, take-leftover-boxes-yourself. And don't dare sit until you've ordered. (Side note: how does this work when it's crowded and there are no tables but you get your food?) As with anything hipster, they have to have some sort of weird take on normal thi

food: 3/5 experience: 0/5 overall: 1/5 An acquaintance took me here for a weird New Year's Eve not-date. For some reason he wanted Vietnamese and wanted to come here specifically. I don't really eat Vietnamese food but I figured why not give it a shot. Let's start with the good. The food... is good. And they have an extensive menu (of soy and things I can't eat). I just ordered a plate of chicken. Literally, that's it. I mean, it's just chicken. Not much to say there. I was trying to eat healthy but it looks fried. Oh well, I tried. They gave a heaping pile of it though. You can't tell by the pic but it must have been a couple pounds uncooked or more. But got damn! The service is in the negative. That simple dish took over frickin' half an hour. My acquaintance got his pork vermicelli plate, which also had egg rolls, shrimp and salad, about fifteen minutes after we ordered (see below). So they definitely fuckin forgot about my food. After ha

food: 3/5 experience: 0/5 overall: 1.5/5 Jesus H. Christ the wait here is long enough to make you wanna kill yourself. We left at 7:30, got here at 8, and weren't seated for almost an hour. It's a Friday night but still that's pretty fuckin long. They said a 30-35min wait. Open tables but no seat-y. And of course once we were seated every table opened up. The only reason we came here was to see what all the fuss was about. It's very popular, I guess since it's a gimmick restaurant like Joe's Crab Shack . So after the torture of waiting over 45 minutes and a certain someone not knowing what they wanted... plus the time it took to cook... lord help me. They gave us "the bibs" first. Then finally, finally , a quarter after 9 p.m., I could enjoy some food. As someone who practices intermittent fasting (intermittently...) let me tell you it was no cake walk waiting. The sweet potato fries are great. You can't go wrong there. But I came for

food: 4.5/5 experience: 5/5 overall: 4.5/5 UPDATE: I tried the new McGriddle! Scroll down to the breakfast section. Man why does bad food taste so good. One thing I like about the keto diet is I can eat all the protein and fat I want which means burgers burgers burgers. I love me some Mickey D's. I don't know what happened, I used to be such a healthy eater, but these past five-odd years I've just been eating everything. It's like my willpower finally broke. Anyway. The locations are all the same, usually friendly service and now they encourage using those automated systems. Sometimes they give me a free drink but even then they're a buck for any size. I've tried all the basics, the burgers, the different buns, the fries. They make delicious-looking (and -tasting) pretzel buns now. Everything from the chicken sandwich to the fish fillet to the regular burger is good, mostly thanks to their buns. There's something to be said for presentation. The

food: 4/5 experience: 5/5 overall: 4.5/5 Hey guys waiting at Iron Horse Tavern. Did you know there's another awesome brunch spot literally right down the street that has very similar items but absolutely no wait time? Cos there is, and it's called the Shady Lady fuckin' Saloon. That's right boys and girls, an old-timey saloon right in the heart of midtown Sacramento. Very chill vibes here on a weekend aftermorning. They have all the basics for brunch: omelets, pancakes, toast, waffles. Cocktails I can't tolerate sigh. But most of all, they have my favorite... Chicken & waffles: 5/5 Yes, chicken and waffles, the match made in heaven, and they have it! It's not on their brunch menu but it's a special they always have. Theirs is fantabulous. The batter is so crisp and flaky that it falls right off the chicken. It looks like it's hand-breaded. The chicken is tender and moist. The waffle comes with powdered sugar and a dollop of freaking bomb-

food: 2.5/5 experience: 1/5 overall: 2/5 Hana Tsubaki is little known by those outside East Sac but definitely a neighborhood family favorite. We pass by it all the time. The interior is pretty small so you can eavesdrop on people across the room. Always fun when the conversation dies. First experience here my mom was raving about how great it was. I was excited to try but was trying to eat healthy at the time so I ordered the sukiyaki with chicken. Little did I know that "with chicken" meant about fifteen nickel-size pieces. The dish was 30% bean sprout, 30% onion, 20% broth. Not bad in flavor but not too filling. We told the waiter and the owner came by and cooked some more chicken for me free of charge which was nice. We also got the tuna tataki appetizer. Decent, a small portion but to be expected. It's just grilled albacore. It has ponzu sauce (soy sauce) on it though so I can't get it anymore. We came back years later and natu

food: 3/5 experience: 0/5 overall: 1.5/5 Sai Varee works if you're in the area and absolutely have to have Thai food rightnow. It's got all the typical offerings and they all (usually) taste as they're supposed to, nothing more. I am convinced this place is open still for that reason and the fact that, after people have developed no taste for Thai outside of this restaurant, they have build up quite a loyal customer base. The service is fuckin slow. I don't care if you're the only one in the restaurant, don't come here if you have somewhere to be in 30-45min. It took twenty minutes for a simple soup-and-salad order. You'll be pissed when someone who came in late gets their order before you which seems to happen. I got the typical grilled beef Thai salad with the lime-chili dressing that every Thai place seems to offer, along with tom kha (coconut milk) soup. The salad is decent. Tastes about the same as everywhere else I've visited with a de

food: 5/5 experience: n/a takeout overall: 5/5 I have a short story for you. This one time in Rancho Murieta I was hungry to the point of tears and wanted pizza because all I ate that day was cereal. Bad decisions were made. So my friend stopped at a pizza place and got me the most delicious personal Hawaiian pizza and I ate all of it. The crust was thick, just how I like it. So doughy and bready and tasty. The pizza was piping hot. The toppings, they did the job. I immediately regretted demolishing it once the box was empty but damn if it wasn't good going down. And I'd do it again if I could. Granted I didn't get to go inside and check it out. But it did taste damn good in the passenger seat of my friend's car.

food: 5/5 experience: 4/5 overall: 4.5/5 I'm not a big fan of Chinese personally, for obvious reasons (everything is soy). But dim sum is another story. And dumplings? Oh boy. I can't resist a good dumpling. Journey to the Dumpling brings the goods. They have several varieties of dumplings including the delectable invention, the soup dumpling! It's a dumpling full of a meat soup. They have a pork one and a shrimp one. These yummy concoctions are to be eaten with a spoon and a fork at the same time. It's a technical skill, trust. But you shall reap the rewards of yummy, soup-filled, steamed hot pastry goodness. Cute presentation as well. Dim sum presentation gets props. They also have regular pan-fried dumplings which are no doubt just as good. Being a Chinese restaurant they do have your typical rigamarole of Chinese cuisine including noodles (in soy broth), fried rice, etc. but I'm not interested in any of that. Give me the dumplingz all day.

food: 2/5 experience: 3/5 overall: 2/5 I mean if you're being held hostage in Elk Grove and the ransom is Mongolian barbecue I guess. Otherwise "just no." Some of the vegetables taste for lack of better word, weird. I like how they put the most voluminous cheap stuff first in the line and then the expensive dense water chestnuts and corn are last. Yes I would like one bowl full of spinach that wilts down to a dollar plus a heap ton of garlic for ten dollars, please. The egg rolls are literally just cabbage. And not good cabbage but nasty greasy cabbage. Well there's no such thing as good cabbage I suppose. I digress. They are also cold and generally everything an egg roll should not be. 2/5 just because it was edible.

food: 4/5 experience: 3/5 overall: 4/5 Pallino is an exclusive pizza joint in Seattle, only available to a certain variety of customers. Yes, that's right, for its location is only to be found (drumroll...) at the airport. Womp. I know. Normally I avoid airport food because the price-to-quality ratio is pretty abysmal. But our layover was too short to get food on either flight and too long to go without it, with not enough room in between to find food in the city. Can't really go wrong with pizza, right? Thing is you have to order ahead of time because they won't start making it until you order it. Makes sense but keep in mind you have a flight to catch, so plan accordingly. At least we know it's fresh. That grip aside, this was the only appealing restaurant in the airport that didn't just serve fish and chips. They had my beloved pizza. Unfortunately for me due to an unannounced termination change I had to wait a half hour before I could enjoy it on the

food: 5/5 experience: 5/5 overall: 5/5 Fah-bulous. Our last dinner stop in Vancouver before we headed home. So many Japanese restaurants in this city. So many. Why this one? Well, it's different, because it's tapas. And it seems to be really popular. I don't know what "guu" is but I want in on it. I'm thinking Japanese tapas? There's a few Guu's in Vancouver so I'll say it's that. Because that's what they serve. So you're gonna wanna get more than one item. We got a salmon potato gratin, duck salad, and beet/pumpkin/green bean dish. The gratin was a daily special. Mashed potatoes, smoked salmon, scallops and cream cheese. All sounded delicious. It was indeed delicious, and nicely portioned. Duck salad was another interesting combo. I love duck but it is usually too fancy to be put in salads. I'm glad they did it because this too was a great, somewhat healthy combo. And then another daily special: pumpkin, be

food: 4/5 experience: 2/5 overall: 3.5/5 My first experience at Siam admittedly wasn't the greatest. Not to say the food wasn't good. We had the hot basil with seafood and the Siam BBQ chicken with a side of steamed vegetables. The hot basil is spicy and sweet, with a decent amount of shellfish in it. They didn't put my favorite vegetables in it (bell peppers, ew) but the seafood was good. And the Siam BBQ chicken tastes like, well, chicken. Not much to comment on there. A respectable amount of vegetables as a side. Again, not much to say, they're just steamed vegetables. I didn't care for their house special sauce, which they use on a bunch of stir-fry dishes - eggplant, Chinese greens, the angry stir-fry. But the service sucks. We didn't get our food until after the people who arrived after us did. We didn't get water until our food was ready. And the water didn't come with ice, even though they give ice to people who buy so